why so much hypocrisy about extra marital sex we all know we are not made equally as far sex is concerned. We all try to accommodate to a point , then comes a state or chance we slip ---- it is too much to control'. Let me give you some examples--- suppose we are asked to eat chocolate pudding every single day and nothing else , i am sure many of us will resist and look for some thing else or we are asked to wear same dress or recite same tune or forced to hear same song i am sure the rest of us will run far and fast. So why it is so different when it comes to extra marital. We are allowed to break and make friends any number of time we want, we can divorce any number of time we want but why it is taboo to stray with right person discreetly once in a while. Why there are no mature persons left to understand this basic thing that we all crave for it but dare not express it. I WISH TO HEAR OTHER OPINIONS PLEASE . AM I THE ONLY PERVERT? AND WHY YOU THINK SO?

are you married?

You arent a pervert, yer just full of shit. Now, mind you I have "extramarital sex", I just do it with permission. You can wax poetiy about pudding, genetics, and the cost of tea in China all you want, but there comes one shining little point: If you took your vows and its expected that you be monogamous? Shut the fuck up and be monogamous. You can try and ask for an open marriage, divorce them and be "true" to your (shitty) self. Keep your pants zipped and your mouth shut. You entered into the contract, shut the fuck up that its actually enforced.

this person should take this concern over To his/her partner .

I mean the OP

your marriage, your rules As long as you BOTH agree on what they are.

Lemme tell ya somethin... Until the day my wife and I chose to amend our vows I did not allow myself to break my vows. That is ed being responsible. (Others it "Being a man") So obviously you cannot control yourself, so you should either not get married or you should divorce. And until you can control yourself you should not be in a relationship period.

The only opinion that counts is you partner's if you have an open relationship, you are allowed to screw 'other people'. If you don't have an open relationship, and you screw around, keep your lawyer's number of speed dial.

Discreetly- that's the problem A mutual agreement to an open marriage is one thing. Being dishonest and risking exposure to STDs is quite another. If someone is being faithful to you- what makes you think it's okay to risk their health or life with your selfish whims?

so talk to a lawyer After you file, you can sleep with who ever you want (assuming they want to sleep with you)

You can do what ever you spouse agrees too... the issue comes into it when you hide what you are doing from your spouse. If you want a little something on the side then there needs to be that agreement. You both can have a little something on the side but you both have to agree to the ground rules. The ground rules of marriage are very clear if you want something different amend the rules and have an open marriage. YOu dont have to be a liar and a cheater. That is where the problems start.